How to horrify friends and neighbors

by | Wednesday | August 5, 2009 | 19 comments

Well, it’s been 5 months since the last time I tried to figure out what to do with my dog’s ashes, and I’m sorry to report I am no closer to a resolution than I was then. Mulan is still on top of the TV. Emmett is next to her. I’m not sure what to do.

Scattering at the house is out, until I’m sure we’re not moving in the next decade. Too much guilt.

Scattering in public is illegal; besides which, I’ve heard  too many horror stories of lovely ceremonies at Sunset Cliffs ruined by an errant gust of wind dumping Uncle Ed back into the faces of the mourners instead of gently spreading him over the Pacific.

Life Gems and other forms of jewelry are out, at least for now.

What’s a girl to do? The cedar boxes in which they arrived are OK, but nothing special. Perhaps while I ponder what to do I should invest in a nicer urn.

How about one of these?

IMG_0030web2

For a mere $2600, you too can take advantage of the latest facial reconstruction technology to create a classy, subtle homage to your dearly departed by placing their ashes into a replica of their decapitated lobotomized skull. All I can think of when I look at that guy with his bemused face as if even he can’t believe what is going on is Ray Liotta in Hannibal. Hey, those Life Gems aren’t looking so ridiculous anymore, are they?

I sent the company an e-mail asking them if they had any plans for similar urns for pets. Not that I want one, mind you, and much to my happiness they said not currently, but it might happen in the future if there is enough interest. Let’s hope not.

I have a great idea! Maybe I can get one made of MY head, and then I can put Mulan and Emmett into it, and have the bottom engraved with- are you ready- “You are always on my mind.”

No?

Filed: Daily Life
  • msubugvet

    true slapstick comedy there Dr. V. :P A good laugh for 7 am on a wednesday

    • http://www.pawcurious.com Dr. V

      I like to give my readers a “heads up” on current trends. :p

  • http://www.3beards.net Lisa

    As I cast my eyes upward toward the remains of my boy Felix, I think about how different companies deliver the remains to the owners. One pet crematorium/cemetery returns them in little tins with paw prints on them. Another one has this little styrofoamy-like container that is shaped like a coffin. Ugh! I don’t want my Mighty Dawg Felix von Furst (yes, I gave him a totally wacky name) resting in a coffin. Besides, it takes up much more room than the simple tin Noah’s uses. I told them a few months ago when I saw them that I prefer the tin.

    Here’s a bit of crazy rescue life. My cohort in the rescue group has a cabinet in the kitchen where she puts the tins of her special pets. Open it up and on the top shelf is an array of tins with paw prints on them. Me, well, I have a treasure map of where I bury the bodies on my 10 acres. And, imagine the horror of coming home after being gone for a few days to find fresh burial plot torn up by some critter trying to get to the body. I’m glad I bury them deep. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not easy having to put the dogs down and I’m thankful that my treasure map has less than 5 ‘x marks the spot’.

    • http://www.pawcurious.com Dr. V

      A styrofoam coffin? How awful! At Davis they had little cardboard coffin-shaped boxes to send pets home in and that was pretty bad, but this is worse.

      I’m glad you have 10 acres! ;) In So Cal we’re lucky to get 1/4 acre. Not so conducive.

  • Megumi

    Oh… my… goodness…

  • Chile

    I wondered if this post was taking a Hannibal turn because all I could see was Ray Liotta. There really is a lack of beautiful resting places for canines. I ended up with a cherry box that has a place for a photo in the front. And thankfully the company was nice enough to warn me that in order to insert the photo I would have to remove a panel and would see the ashes. That was probably one of the hardest things I had ever done. In fact it still makes my heart stop.

    • http://www.pawcurious.com Dr. V

      Our place has the ashes in a sealed bag inside the box. My sister asked me for a scoop of Emmett- don’t ask me why- but I haven’t been able to bring myself to open it.

      • Chile

        Blade’s were sealed too but just seeing them…it was hard. It took me a good few months before I got up the courage to put his photo in there. I had to remind myself that it wasn’t really him, just his body. Hell, I tear up now thinking about it. I just have to think that his spirit and soul are still with me. But I find myself still doing the same bedtime ritual when I go to sleep. I can’t change that yet.

  • Kim

    I think the last idea is definitely best. ;) We got a very large non-urnlike-urn (pottery) because when we thought about the logistics, there’s no way I want 5 urns of dogs/cats with angel wings hanging around the house. The thought of it creeped me out. This is, of course, before I read the fantastic “you are always on my mind” idea. Brilliant!

  • Jamie

    I am still at this delimma with Chase. It has been almost 6 months since he passed, but his little cedar box is sitting in our curio cabinet, along with his cremation certificate and clay paw print the Vet made after he passed. The cedar box they gave us, is actually really nice. it has his name and date of death inscripted on the front of it… so for a minute I thought of getting a nicer urn, but just never got around to it. I still to this day, walk by it and just dunno what to do. I think I am going to leave it be for now… I just can’t imagine spreading his ashes somewhere… he was definitely happiest at home (inside, none the less, he didn’t care much for being outside), and I know we will be moving in the next 5 or so years and it would kill me to ‘leave him behind’. I’ve thought about the life gem thing, but it is so pricey. So for now, I got a pawprint necklace (from Ashley and Co.) with Chase’s name inscripted on the front and “always in my heart” inscripted on the back that I wear everyday currently.

    This is going off on a tangent, and I didn’t mean it to, lol. I have opened Chase’s box… it actually brought me a little bit of closure to see his ashes. It took me a few months to open it…you have to unscrew the bottom off…but when I did, it actually brought me a little peace.

    The last idea is pretty spiffy though. ;) Though a previous poster does bring up a good point. I have two other (bigger) dogs currently and will definitely have more in the future. What am I going to do with a bunch of cedar boxes laying around in the years to come? Yikes!

  • jw

    *gigglesssssssss* @ your always on my mind. Ya need to put a tin-foil hat on there, buddy!

    See you ARE a sick unit too, Dr. V.

    I have the ashes of my beloved Rocky, (the horseshit eating boxer), and have wondered what the hell to do with them. I’m in the process of losing my little beloved, 14 year old corgie-spanial, Prince.

    We came across a pet cemetary the other day, and Hubby said, “Well, that’s a thought.” I told him not no but HELL NO! Then he says “…well, it’s not as abnormal as carrying ashes around in a vase..” So……..well, I’ve a thought. When I get Prancer back, I’m gonna co-mingle their (Rocky and Prince) ashes and take a small teaspoon of them and put in my heart locket, and sodder the locket closed. I reckon then I will always have them with me, such that it is. Then hubby won’t be skeeved out about me keeping ashes, and I will still have my connection.

    I thought the carbon ring connection was pretty cool, but a little to pricey for me.

    An aside, because I feel like rambling…lol… Prince is AKA Prancer because he would hind up and “prance” from side to side like he was a friggin’ cutting horse. He was good at it too. I shall miss him so much.

    Why do they make it so hard for us to go on without them. God Bless ALL the aminules.

    jw

    • http://www.pawcurious.com Dr. V

      I’m so sorry Prince is sick. It sucks in order to have all the good parts, we have to suffer this part.

  • http://www.savour-fare.com Kate @ Savour Fare

    But why does he have no hair but a beard?

  • Megan

    I kinda like the lifegems thing, but I know they’re expensive. I’ve also thought about those little pendants where you can put a small amount of your pet/loved one’s ashes in the, but I think that’s a little creepier than a lifegem. We have a client at our clinic who had DNA pendants (http://perpetua.us/) made from her bunnies (yep, I have crazy bunny clients!) . I had to argue with my staff that it was in fact NOT an actual segment of the pet’s DNA displayed in beautiful crystal, but the dyed chunk of many, many DNA fragments spun into a double helix pattern. Sigh, some people think you can see a double helix with the naked eye.
    Here in Chicago we have several very nice pet cemeteries. I may consider scattering my girls at one of the cemeteries after taking the scoop or two of them that I can save. I just can’t see my pets wanting to sit in a box on my shelf in my house for the rest of their lives. I think the full-circle coming from the earth and returning to the earth is ore consistent with my own beliefs.

    • http://www.pawcurious.com Dr. V

      Oh…they really thought that was a single piece of DNA? But…but…never mind.

  • Nicole

    *facepalm*

    Well that is just slightly terrifying.

    Strangely I am one of those people that doesn’t really need the body close to me. I moved around a lot when I was younger, which I am sure is a large contributing factor, and sometimes I wish I’d kept the ashes of my first rat (I loved him more than any animal I have ever owned; I am not ashamed to play favuorites). But mostly, something about me doesn’t really need the closure of remains. And I think a large part of it is exactly this: how the hell do you go about it? A box of ashes? A burial? A diamond (whoa)?

    I do, though, understand why it’s such an important thing for other people. I hope you find a solution that brings you peace.

    Or, you know. You could go with the head. xD Gotta love a pun that bad.

  • Shannon

    I know someone who mixed her husband’s ashes with her dog’s ashes – she said, ‘That way, I can give both of them a pat on the head before I go to work.’

    • http://www.pawcurious.com Dr. V

      Aw, that is actually sweet.

  • http://gutsandshame.blogspot.com CarrieP

    We paid for a Memory Glass (http://www.memoryglass.com/) for our beloved cat George but then couldn’t bring ourselves to scoop out his ashes and send them away so the glass could be made, so we just kept them in the cardboard box. One of these days we really should do something about that…it’s been two years.