Insomniac

by | Wednesday | November 9, 2011 | 19 comments

I have had the worst insomnia lately. I don’t know what the deal is. I lay awake, totally exhausted and ready to die, but my eyes betray me and snap open and there I lay, till 1, till 2, looking at the ceiling and thinking about nothing and everything.

I suppose this will bode well for me this weekend, this whole no sleeping thing, but for now, it stinks. Because I’m the zombie. Although I’m awake, I’m useless. I thought I would try to continue the Africa recaps for you but 1. I’m in St. Louis tonight and I left all my pictures at home, and 2. I started to write something but in my awake yet incoherent state it came out kind of like this:

I sure did like them chimps.

And that was as far as I got. But we have the assassination! And the hippos! And the flying the plane in the Serengeti! And the marauding elephants! And the leopards! And Graeme the disgruntled disillusioned imprisoned Scottish balloon pilot! So much to write and me so utterly useless. I was sure I had 4 or 5 other things I was supposed to be writing about this week but all I can think is “Oh man, I’m so tired. So, so tired. And my carcass will not drift off to sleep despite my best attempts.”

Normally, in these situations I have a plan. I have Brody. And when all else fails, I lay down on my dog, because nothing encourages rest and relaxation like laying on a Golden retriever, who will sit silent and perfectly still letting your head rise and fall on his chest all day. Usually that does the trick, and if not I still feel better for having buried my hands in Golden fur for an hour or so. But I couldn’t bring Brody to Missouri, so the best I can manage to snuggle with is the hotel bathrobe.

The worst part about it is, if I can’t figure out what I’m stressed about- things are going along just fine- then the fact that I can’t figure out what I’m stressing about, stresses me out and then I get more worked up and more awake than ever. And then it’s 6 am and the cat is drooling in my face begging for food.

Other than mind-altering approaches like alcohol, benadryl and/or Ambien, anyone have any good suggestions for getting rid of the insomnia? I’m beginning to wonder if it really is my subconscious warning me of the impending zombie attacks and trying to keep me awake. The very fact that my mind is going there has me concerned this sleep deprivation is really getting to me.

Filed: Blog, Health, Musings
  • http://novemberdog.com Sherry

    This helps me to relax, sometimes, when I’m lying in bed and I can’t sleep and suddenly my heart starts racing because surely there must be something, somewhere, horribly wrong (like the zombies at the door):

    First, tense every muscle in your body. As tightly as you can. And hold it. For I don’t know–a minute, say. Then, starting from the tips of your toes, slowly relax each muscle, working your way up to your head. Go slowly. If you feel anything below the “line of relaxation” starting to tense up again, slow down, and make sure it’s all loosey-goosey. By the time you make it to the top of your head, you should be a limp jelly-paste on your bed.

    I find it’s good not only for the relaxation, but because it usually requires quite a bit of time, and quite a bit of concentration. Which means time not obsessing over the time, or falling asleep, or the zombies that surely have, by now, shuffled their way to my flesh.

    Hope you get some sleep! Having my dog with me on sleepless nights is one of those things that I miss terribly since my dog (my heart!) passed.

    Looking forward to reading more about Africa, and the posts this weekend!

    • Isa

      The relaxation technique works for me every time. It relaxes my muscles while keeping my mind busy. Perfect combination.
      Kitty snuggling also works, assuming you have a cat that is snuggles inclined..

  • http://www.facebook.com/dzubaka Ashley Dzubak

    Take a 5mg melatonin. It will ease you to sleep but it’s not going to knock you out and you won’t feel groggy in the morning. That’s what I had to do for about a month when my new medicine was giving me insomnia o.O Worse side effect ever for a busy college student o.O

  • Gayle

    If you’re literally experiencing your eyes snapping open, like I sometimes do, try an eye cover. At first it takes a little getting used to, but once you get comfortable with it, it’s a gentle way to 1) block out any light in the room and 2) remind your eyes that there’s nothing to look at, so they may as well stay closed.
    I’ve also taken melatonin with some success.

  • Leigh

    When I wake up in the night, even if I’m not stressing at first, I start stressing that time is passing, and that i’ll be tired, and then I start trying to force myself to sleep.. when only makes sleep stay farther away. Then I start doing “mind games” that require concentration, but not so much that you won’t fall asleep.

    1) teach yourself the alphabet backwards. (Took my about 6 months working on it, because it’s harder than you think, and I’d always fall asleep in the middle!)

    2) count backwards in threes or fours. (Not as hard to do, but works in a pinch)

    3) My favorite… name famous people in alphabetical order. (I always use actors, but you can do athletes, authors, etc…) For example, Angela Landsbury, Bo Derek, Clark Gable, etc… etc… It’s even harder to do double names like Alan Alda, Benjamin Bratt, Claudete Colbert. That will make you concentrate, and stop thinking about NOT sleeping, and yet not concentrate hard enough to stay awake… I usually fall asleep by about H. Lol.

  • http://www.AskAVetQuestion.com Dr. Marie

    I would second the idea of trying Melatonin. It’s supposed to help get your circadian rhythm back in order. When I had my little girl and she started sleeping through the night my body was so used to waking up that I couldn’t sleep. Melatonin was a great thing for me!

    I don’t know if you need 5mg though. The tablets I took were 3 mg and I found that often 1/2 a tablet was plenty. They’re usually sublingual so make sure you don’t just swallow them but let them dissolve under your tongue.

    I did find I was a little bit groggy in the morning, but it was not too bad. Then, after a night or two of taking Melatonin I found I didn’t need it anymore.

  • LB

    Try some Yoga or Qi-Gong, both allow your brain to focus on your breathing and nothing else.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1209375425 Susan Shields Montgomery

    I can loan you some Microsoft tech books, put me to sleep every time.
    I also have had sever insomnia in the past. I drink mint tea, do some yoga stretches, then lie on the bed and relax muscles starting from the feet and going up.

  • Doggy Dessert Chef

    Celestial Seasonings SleepyTime Tea. Melatonin works too but it always gave me horrible dreams, but that did mean I was asleep!

    • macula_densa

      This. If you can find the uber one with valerian root it’s even better.

    • PudgysHuman

      Ditto this.

  • http://casacaudill.blogspot.com casacaudill

    If you’ve seen my 3 a.m. blog posts and/or tweets, you know I’m quite the insomniac myself (thank goodness for “work from home” jobs). Most of the time I start off with a hot bath with lavender oil, making sure the lights are off. Sometimes I’ll put on one of the many spa/relaxation channels from Pandora. If that doesn’t work and I’m still awake I pop a Target brand sleeping pill and that usually does the trick. I have a few prescriptions that I can take but I like the Target one best. For some reason my body fights Melatonin.

  • JaneK

    ok, I know you said other than Ambien but seriously…… AMBIEN!! I took it for about 10 years b/c the sleep gene did not make it in our family; had no withdrawal coming off cold turkey when I got pregnant….couldn’t sleep but no withdrawal. Now I just take 5 mg and it does the trick to shut my overactive brain down to sleep. It is good to get someone back in a rhythm if you normally can sleep and are just in a funk…. so, sorry, I gave you the advice you said you didn’t want but it is such a great drug and generic now, too! Or maybe look into accupuncture or accupressure….. I haven’t tried that but it would be worth a shot! good luck! insomnia sucks…..

  • Jeanne

    hot chocolate made with milk and a little bit of bailey’s always works for me. but if you’re not into that, go for the melatonin. that works, too, but it doesn’t taste as good.

  • Anonymous

    I used to count sheep, but seriously, it was counter-productive. I’d lay there in bed, eyes closed, breathing deep, imagining sheep as they sailed over the fence. 1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7…and then it would happen. Little sheep #8 wouldn’t jump over the fence. Every GD night that stupid little sheep would run right up to the fence, panic and back off. Then I’d start to reason with the sheep, telling him I was trying to get to sleep, trying to bully him into jumping and finally begging him. By that time, I’d have woken my other half up and he would remind me that I was absolutely insane, but that he loved me anyways. With that reminder that I was fussing over nothing, I’d have a lovely cup of chamomile tea, with a tiny bit of valerian in it. I would snuggle up with a soft lamp casting just enough light to read a slightly dull book and drift off to sleep in no time. Looking back. I’m not sure why I just didn’t start there?

  • Vonny

    Ok, I find the relaxation technique works best. But picture yourself sitting up on the bed. As you relax bit by bit you are slowly sinking down into… giant marshmallows, giant, pilllow-sized ones. When you head sinks down, you should be just about asleep. If not, turn your head slightly and take a nibble of one marshmallow (night time giant marshmallows will not leave your face sticky). There you go.

  • Lisa W

    Melatonin has worked for me in the past. Also, what I usually do is read. It works better now that I have my Kindle and only have a very small light to deal with…

  • Amy

    Relaxation exercise, radio on static (quiet), plan the perfect picnic meal and then go on that picnic, imaging the perfect spot, time of year, weather, clouds, sun on your face, the heat warming your body, starting with the top of your head, so nice and warm but not hot, warmth flowing down your neck, and now the shoulders and down the arms alllll the way to your fingertips, feeling like butter melting, the chest, breathing slower now, deeper as the abdomen warms up, puddle of butter, speading out, hips, thighs, just warm, so nice, knees, warm calves so gone can’t feel a thing, slower breathing, feet, just toes remaining, loving the sun, melllllting, butter…then about here I snort and I’m awake again!

  • Kris Maxwell

    Audiobooks. I am the worlds leading expert on insomnia but here is the cure. Find an audiobook version of a book that you like but have already read. Set it up so that you can listen to it quietly in bed. The story is just enough to shut off all the “noise” in your head. Since you already know the story, the story itself won’t keep you awake. Nowadays, I use my iPod and set the timer on it to shut itself off after 20 minutes. This REALLY works.