I’ve managed to avoid certain unsavory sorts of procedures for my entire career, but sometimes a vet’s gotta do what a vet’s gotta do. This week, I had to remove an eyeball.
I know I’m not alone in saying that, even though my job consists of expressing anal glands and cleaning out infected pustular abscesses, even the most hardened, non-gross-outable of us are sometimes squeamish about eyes. It took me 10 years to work up the nerve to get Lasik. I had to leave during “Fire in the Sky” during that one scene- ugh, if you’ve seen it you know the one. Eyes. Ick.
And by “had to remove,” I really do mean “had to.” I refer these guys out usually, for lots of reasons, but these owners were just unable to swing a specialist. The dog was in a lot of pain from his condition, and a less than perfect enucleation would still be loads better than an untreated pup. So I did it.
Much like when I neutered Brody earlier, it helps to be focused on the task at hand- “dissect out the bulbar conjunctiva, locate and transect the orbicularis muscles” as opposed to “good GOD I can’t believe I’m pulling some poor dog’s eyeball out of his head OMG OMG OMG GROSS AIEEEEEE” which is understandably the sort of visceral reaction I was expecting. It actually wasn’t that bad. I was flush with the certainty that this barbaric sort of procedure was really in the dog’s best interest.
And when I was done, I was girlishly proud of myself like I was back in school or something. I texted my friends. I called my husband on business in China (he wasn’t as thrilled to hear from me as I thought he would be, oddly enough). I had flashbacks to the Dark Crystal and made Aughra references none of the fetuses I work with got.
My parents pretended to be interested for the intro but cut me off before I got into any details. “That’s nice, dear,” they said, before asking me what to get my daughter for Christmas. I don’t know how I ended up as their daughter, truth be told.
The Dark Crystal was one of my favourite movies when I was little. I just don’t understand how so many people haven’t seen it. I make references to it all the time, and all I get are blank stares. 🙁
I mean, I can get some people not catching my Star Wars or Legend of Zelda references, but Jim Henson is a much beloved part of almost everyone’s childhood. People watched muppets in one way or another, be it Sesame Street, The Muppet Show, Fraggle Rock, or what have you… Why have they not seen the muppet masterpiece that is The Dark Crystal?
Also, ew, eye surgery. I’m working up the nerve to get Lasik done myself, getting tired of my poor vision.
The Lasik wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. The valium helped.
I’ll cheerlead you Jessica! Awesome job doing an enucleation! While eyes don’t really make me squeamish, per se, my biggest fear for doing enucleations (I’ve only done one so far, and it was mostly already done for me when the dog got there) is not properly ligating the nerve and vessel at the back of the eye, and having blood gushing everywhere. It probably isn’t as bad as I have pictured in my mind… And yeah, I’m still a Lasik chicken. I don’t know if I’ll ever do it. I fear waking up all blind with a botched job or something.
And as long as we’re takling about Jim Henson masterpieces, can I get a holla for Labyrinth? David Bowie in spandex and big hair is… magnificent…
Love love love Labryrinth! My husband and I watch it a lot. Husband loves the Dark Crystal as well. 🙂 I, unfortunately, am one of those people that never saw it, but we’re working on it!
Oh well, yes, I might have had those exact difficulties you describe. And yes, it was a bloody mess. Horrible.
Labyrinth FTW! I know it practically by heart.
I have a major eye phobia. There is NO way I could EVER do an enucleation, I literally get sick to my stomach thinking about it. Like you, I can’t even watch movies with those scenes even though I know it’s fake. Things like that are putting a damper on my hopes of becoming a vet 🙁 I really wish I had a stronger stomach.
My grandmother was going into nursing. She got pretty far in it to the level she was actually assisting in surgery, handing people tools and the like.
Until day the doctor asked her to ‘please lift the eye from the socket and discard it’.
Then she wasn’t going into nursing anymore.
To put this in perspective, this grandmother essentially hitchhiked across WWII Germany at the age of 14. She’s pretty hard-core as grandmothers go.
I think you deserve a high-five at least.
Online high five! Even though you almost made me ralph up my lunch.
Eeewwwww! Okay, now for the congrats. Really…you go, girl!
Weirdly, I can do eyes, no problem (in theory; not like I’m a vet). They don’t disturb me/gross me out and if one of cats had one pop out I’d be alarmed and distraught but not exactly wanting to throw up.
Snot does it in for me. Not as big a problem with dogs and cats, thank goodness. This is why I’ll never have kids. Typing the word made me retch.
I have a friend who’s an EMT who gets sick at the smell of vomit. As you can imagine, this is sometimes complicated.
Your friend must be continually nauseated.
I can do eyes (years ago I had a hamster with an eye infection and I had to express the stinky gunk and put medicine in his eye — my mom told me if I could do that I could do anything). And I do okay with puppy vomit (not so the human variety). But a few months ago my Sophie had several episodes of pretty liquid-y diarrhea during the night, in several locations throughout the house. That particular clean-up tested me as nothing else ever has!
Stealth diarrhea is the worst!
After reading posts about snot, vomit, and diarrhea, I did not get queasy. But reading about the hamster made me cringe. So I have come to the conclusion that I must be weird.
High five to you! I certainly couldn’t do it. Dark Crystal, Labyrinth, Legends, all movies of lyrical beauty sadly overlooked by many.
I had a moment of geekiness- and I’m not going to go into detail because it would just make things worse- but at the end of said geeky moment I ended up with a Jen Gelfling doll that I love and hide in the garage so the kids can’t get at her.
I am a nurse, and with a very strong stomach. Nothing bothered me at all – not vomit, blood, pus, gangrenous limbs, open fractures, surgeries of any kind, I was known as the rock of my nursing class. The one thing that did me in was toenails: anything about them, any age, any chore. Ingrown toenail surgery was out of the question to assist with. trimming nails – no way!! I am not even that fond of my OWN, tho I do manage. I would trade that chore with my fellow nurses for anything they didn’t want to do. They loved me for it. hahahaha
People gross me out way more than animals, for whatever reason. My OB was once telling me how she didn’t know how I did it, and I was like, but look at what you do all day!!!
What? No pictures?!?
LOL. No.
Wound care was my nemesis, serious wound care. You are a very good egg! Good job, no great job!
Way to go Dr. V! Faced down a challenged and won the battle.
Aughra was my favorite, rogue eye and all. I refer to the Dark Crystal all of the time when I am lecturing on Leadership, Good vs Evil, etc. Believe it or not, most of the audience has seen the Dark Crystal. But, then most of the audience are baby boomers!