Dear Kevin, I'm sure you get fan letters all the time, from people who love your art: Clerks, Dogma, Chasing Amy. I think Chasing Amy was one of the first movies I watched with my boyfriend, who is now my husband. He thinks you're the cheese. I think you are a great writer, and like all great writers you have an amazing willingness to share things that other people hold close. Painful things, like a humiliating experience with an airline or, in this case, the terribly personal loss of a ... Read more »
Kekoa
A Lesson in Love and Heart
One year ago today, we said goodbye to Kekoa. After a month of bucket list indulgences going from kale to turkey and then, that day, chocolate chip bacon ice cream, I said I love you one last time. We pet owners talk a lot about heart dogs, that dog who just 'got' you, the dog who changed you and will never, ever be replaced (you can substitute dog for any pet, of course.) And once you have a heart dog, once you lose a heart dog, you may wonder if you will ever have another one again. I'm ... Read more »
We Will Remember You- Tonight and Always
Yesterday, I was working on a homework assignment for a course I am taking on pet loss and bereavement. I was reading about the guilt so much of us feel after losing a pet, and one of the exercises they recommend we do is imagine a conversation with our pet. I decided I would try this with Kekoa, as I struggled- like so many people do- with knowing if it was the right time to say goodbye to her last year as she dealt with bone cancer. Me: Kekoa, I'm sorry. Kekoa: I love you. Me: I feel ... Read more »
Muscle Memory
Scientists have long been fascinated with the concept of "muscle memory", that subconscious part of our brain that controls movement without us having to think about it. It's what allows us to do complicated tasks such as riding a bike or typing "the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog" without having to stop and say, OK, I need to contract my left hamstring while extending my right quadricep and all those tricky things that go into motion. It's what allows me to tie a knot during surgery ... Read more »
Tip Number One in the Grieving Process: Get Takeout
Everyone processes grief differently. From those who wear it all on their sleeve to those who bottle it in and let it slowly eat them up inside to those who tackle an entirely unrelated project with distracted abandon, being sad is a universal condition we all have to figure out how to deal with. I grew up in New England. We're taught from an early age not to show sadness. Or happiness, or anything, really, other than a mild general irritation with other human beings. "Be like a cement ... Read more »
Please God, let me go with my face in a plate of chocolate chip ice cream
Friday things were getting bad, Kekoa's leg was aching. So you know, it's time to go, But not without some bacon. Saturday was super great, All day long we ate and ate, Venison, rabbit, gator too, All day feasting through and through. And when Sunday came around, Gray and rainy, under cloud, I sat down and then I cried, Cause it was time to say goodbye. When the doctor gave the shot, My dear dog, she felt it not Because she had - don't get me wrong- In her paws, ... Read more »
Buckets of food: GATOR!
I haven't been posting about Kekoa's culinary adventures every day, but trust me, she has turned into a regular Anthony Bourdain. When I first said I was doing this Foodie Bucket List for her, my good friend Annette at Biscuits by Lambchop decided to do something very special for us, and I wanted to share it with you all: It really meant a lot to both of us that you did that. Thank you Annette. :D And they smelled really good, too. ... Read more »
Smooth Criminal
It's been a mystery in the house ever since we moved in: who's been raiding the cat litter? Until we get the cat door installed between the house and the garage, we've been stuck leaving the door open and trying with varied success to block the perp from the garage. Suspect One: Brody Has been seen lurking in the vicinity of the garage door, occasionally licking lips and acting guilty. Suspect Two: Koa Despite outward appearances, the more sneaky of the two. Spotted with evidenciary ... Read more »
Buckets of food: Tramaducken
Tramaducken: A turkey, stuffed with a duck, stuffed with a chicken, stuffed with assorted pain medications. Merrick makes a Turducken canned food that allowed me to get all three in there in one shot. Did not have any problems getting the dogs to eat this, lick the plate, lick each other's plate, then beg me incessantly for more. ... Read more »
Buckets of food, Day 5: Pizza
Every bucket list should include a good bit of pizza, I think. So I sliced off a little dog-sized piece of a cheese pizza for Koa, just enough for her to get what all the fuss has been about these last few years. Brody's getting to play along just because I feel sorry for him being left out. That being said, if he wants in on this, he's gonna have to work for it. He has no bucket list excuse. ... Read more »
Pain, masks, and the longest hike
It's weird how the universe works in parallel sometimes. About 10 days or so ago, I broke my toe. And just so you know I'm not making this up: I really did. Not doing anything heroic, unfortunately. I broke it by running too enthusiastically into an unpacked box that was filled with some as-of-yet unknown substance, probably cement, or maybe iron bars or something. Nonetheless, what I thought was a stubbed toe turned into that mess within a day or so. It's not bad. It's taped up and I can ... Read more »
Buckets of Food, Day 4: Sliders
Now this is what I'm talking about. Trader Joe's super lean slider patty with a blob of ketchup. I'm not sure that Koa has ever tasted ketchup, unless she stole something with ketchup on it at one point. This bucket list thing is going over pretty well, I'd say. ... Read more »
Buckets of Food, Day 3: Zucchini
Plain pieces of raw zucchini. I didn't think she would go for this one. She, in fact, ate almost a whole zucchini. Brody, on the other hand...not until I put some parmesan on it. Do you see this? This is him begging for a piece although the piece he JUST SPIT OUT is still sitting next to him. It's the same thing, Brody. ... Read more »
Bucket Full of Food, Day 2: Kale
Don't worry, I'm not going to make her eat vegetables every day. She gets what I get, which today was kale chips, and man were they good. She chomped one up and asked for more. Brody was not impressed. He's holding out for "bacon day." ... Read more »
A Bucket Full of Food: Day 1: Jicama
Well, just because my dog is sick doesn't mean we can't have fun. Indeed, I would argue it is more an impetus than ever to have fun. With Emmett, that meant taking long walks every day until he didn't want to anymore. He was an explorer, a retriever's retriever, and all he wanted to do was splash in the water and chase birds. Koa hates adventure. She's a homebody. I was thinking to myself, what would be on her bucket list? And all I could come up with was, A Menu. So there you have it. ... Read more »
It’s OK to be angry- the topic I hate to revisit
It was the day after Christmas, which is how these things always seem to go. I looked at the x-ray on the monitor and smushed my lips together at what I saw. "That looks terrible," I say to my friend Kristen, also a veterinarian. She nods glumly. A lytic, destructive bone lesion. Pretty cut and dried for cancer. Survival statistics for cancer depend on a lot of things, but one of the main prognostic indicators is type of cancer. Bone cancers are notoriously nasty and challenging to treat. ... Read more »
The Realtor, by Edgar Labby Koe
Once upon a midday dreary, home from working, weak and weary, Staring with resentment at the “For Sale” sign perched near the door, While I Facebooked, blogged and Tweeted, on the sofa, softly seated, Suddenly I felt quite heated, heated staring at the floor. “Tis an old juice box,” I muttered, “sitting crumpled on the floor- Garbage there, it makes me sore.” Ah, so clearly I recall that it was in the chill of fall, And each separate messy creature wrought its carnage on the ... Read more »
Happy birthday Koa- no joke
Two years ago this February, we took an hour and a half drive north to the Retrievers and Friends rescue to meet a 6 year old black lab named Lucy. She was feisty, glossy, and fun, a slightly older version of Brody. We loved Lucy. But then the rescue volunteer suggested we take a look at another dog, one who didn't photograph quite so well but was kind and sweet and might be a good match for the family. There she stood, with her hangdog face and her defeated posture and her barrel chest and ... Read more »
