It took me a good decade, but I can finally say I think I’m getting this motherhood thing figured out. It was not intuitive for me, not easy or instantly amazing the way it was when I brought home my first pet. With my animals, I knew no matter how challenging things were, we would figure it out and it would be ok. I don’t know why I lacked that confidence with the kiddos. Maybe I’m just part dog. But no matter! We all have our strengths in life, but the one thing I wish I knew a lot earlier ... Read more »
parenting
I’ve Got Thick Skin, and a Fuzzy Heart
I was certain when I had kids that my motherhood chip would finally kick in, that I would finally start to react to babies the way I reacted to dogs and cats. Because surely that maternal instinct in my heart had merely been misdirected all these years, and was simply in need of a little oxytocin and fine-tuning to point it to the appropriate species upon which I should lavish my affection. Now my kids are 11 and 9 and I can say this with absolute certainty: not so much. Don't get me ... Read more »
Nobody puts Geeky in the corner
When I was six, my mother enrolled me in my first dance class. I enjoyed it, I had fun, I got to wear cute little sailor costumes and get up on stage and tunelessly tap my feet. The teacher always arranged us in two rows, and this being the early 80s before everyone had to get equal play, she arranged us not by height but by talent. The precocious dancers with the big smiles and the good rhythm were front and center, and those who tripped on their shoelaces or danced with the angry pounding ... Read more »
Headless dog cakes and other sundry sacrifices
Before I get into the details of this weekend, it's important to understand the massive pile of guilt from under which I was trying to emerge. One year ago this month, the chaos began. The endless lines of people rifling through our home in an endless stream had already been going on for seven months, but one year ago was when we agreed, from exhaustion more than anything else, to sell the home. All for the promise of a better education for the kids, which necessitated a move out of the ... Read more »
The One Thing I’m Telling You Before You Have a Kid
There are few situations I dread more than a young couple with a new pet they refer to as "our child". I'm not talking every young couple with a pet, mind you, but specifically those that refer to him or her as a kid. Though you might expect these to be the most involved and conscientious owners, and oftentimes they are, just as often you see them about a year or two later with a stroller and a decidedly changed attitude. And then you don't see them at all. Note to Allison: You Personally ... Read more »
Love Match
I can see a thousand things, and I can go a thousand places, but not a thing brings so much joy as doggie kisses on happy faces. ... Read more »
Using snakes to light a fire
I think I could have been very happy as a biologist. It was the direction in which I was headed, though always with the intent of turning my bachelors degree in biology into a professional degree. I chose to ignore the fact that I really loved biology as its own pursuit, fascinated with taxonomy and utterly enchanted with the concept of sitting on a smelly pile of rocks in a harbor by Marina del Rey counting mussels. I understood this, the pursuit of knowledge for its own sake, trying to get a ... Read more »
A restful weekend
Normally I take the weekends as a time to unwind, refresh my brain, and get ready for the next week. Usually this is a doable thing. But, sometimes things get kind of nutty, and in those times there's not much to be done except deal with it and let all the other things you're supposed to do- like blog- fall by the wayside. My husband left on Friday for a weeklong business trip overseas. It happens, that's part of his job description. But it certainly provides for certain, shall we say, ... Read more »
A whale of a tale
I haven't been whale watching since I was a kid. It seems counter-intuitive, seeing as how I live right along the path of the gray while migration, and I have a marine biology background, but I guess it's one of those things I keep meaning to do but never get around to. Just like people who live in Las Vegas never go to the strip, or those in LA stay away from Universal Studios, you tend to avoid the touristy stuff in the area in which you live. So when a friend of mine asked if anyone was ... Read more »
Everyone’s a cynic
"Come to my store!" exalted my daughter, pulling me up the stairs. I obliged, wondering which of my possessions she was going to try to sell back to me this time. That one has always been possessed of an entrepreneurial spirit. " I have bracelets," she said, gesturing to an array of beaded items she had crafted using the bead kit she got for her birthday. "And neck-a-laces," picking up a pair of Mardi Gras beads she inherited at some point. I picked up a bracelet. "How much?" I ... Read more »
Faith in humanity, restored
Among one's many obligations as parent to a school-aged child is that most universal of school experiences, chaperoning a school field trip. My number got called this week, when my second grader's class went to the zoo. She of course volunteered me, assuming- correctly- that this was the sort of thing I was up for (as opposed to the kindergarten trip to Sea World), and for the most part I was happy to do it. Until I heard it was going to be raining. Now, laugh all you want, but we San ... Read more »
Don’t leave the vet in charge
I have a new Baking With Brody post ready to go that just needs a couple more pictures. I'll have it up this weekend, just in time for Halloween. So in the meantime, a corollary to yesterday's post: One of my tasks as kindergarten room mom, a job I grudgingly agreed to despite my better judgment, is to decorate the booth at the kid's Halloween carnival. I thought we would be provided with games and we would simply be in charge of manning it, but oh, no, we need to actually come up with an ... Read more »
Underachieving Moms Club
I am possessed of the vague and disquieting sense of disease that comes from knowing you are incredibly behind in everything you are supposed to be doing. Case in point: I promised my kids a month ago I would make them banana bread. I've tried three times, and every time I go to do it someone has eaten the bananas below the requisite number needed to make said bread. So they have been eating the Frankenberry cereal that one of the grandparents bought when we were in Africa for the past three ... Read more »
That’s my Girl
Last week, my daughter's Girl Scout troop was decorating t-shirts for Halloween. Now, ever since we've gotten back from Africa the only thing my little Jane Goodall can talk about is all the animals we saw, and when can we go on another safari, and can she please come. She even made me a picture book of drawings of all the animals we showed her. She was not even scared when I told her we came across a giraffe that had been eaten by a lion on the side of the road. She is, for sure, my ... Read more »
We all have our talents
I volunteer in my kids' classrooms on a quasi-regular basis. I do it because they need the help, not because I have a great deal to contribute to the average 5 year old. Yes, even now, they still scare me. The first time I went in, the kindergarten teacher had several tasks for me to choose from. One, pull a bunch of papers out of some books and then sort them. Admin stuff. Two, call the kids back one by one to work on writing their names. Uh oh. Interactive stuff. I never know what to do ... Read more »
Blackout
When the power went kablooey on Thursday, I figured the most lasting effect would be a resurgence of interest in knowing where we kept the spare batteries. It's never that simple, is it? Well, first of all, the local sewage treatment facility dumped 3.5 million gallons into the ocean, shutting down the beach and delaying the Surf Dog-a-thon to a day we absolutely, positively cannot make. Brody and I are so, so sad about that. Worse things have happened, of course, but we're still ... Read more »
Born to Be Wild: finally getting a movie right!
You all remember the Tyrannosaur movie debacle? It's taken me all this time to work up enough nerve to go to another science museum movie after leaving the theater with two howling kids in tow. In the interim, we went to see Disney's African Cats, which was another hot mess ("Mommy, why are all the kittens dead?" etc) and didn't help my opinion of modern nature documentaries. When I was reading all the sad reviews of African Cats, dubbing it "most depressing nature film ever made" and that ... Read more »
Kitty Purry
Here's one of the great things about raising pets: sure, your lack of training may turn them into ill behaved mischief makers, but it's much harder to really screw them up psychologically than it is kids. Teach them sit, stay, and a few basic manners and for the most part, you have harmony. Kids, on the other hand, are almost impossible not to mess up. You either neglect them or spoil them, demean them or overly praise them, treat them like Oliver Twist or Veruca Salt. No matter what you do, ... Read more »
