I thought that with age and wisdom we were supposed to become more jaded, more distinctly un-sentimental. In some aspects, this is true. For example, I can't watch one of those Disney princess movies without wanting to gag- I mean really, Prince Charming is kind of skeevy when you think about it: stalking women and throwing shoes at them, hints of necrophilia and the like. I look at my little scrapbook pile of love notes from high school and want to laugh and/or cry at my naive ... Read more »
Musings
Time to go home!
I get on a plane to go back home tonight. This is a good thing. I miss, in no particular order, my kids, my pets, my husband, my bed, and my Keurig. I realized that I am not at all prepared for my role as Art Docent in my daughter's kindergarten class this Friday, so when I get home late tonight I have to immediately launch into tracing 30 yellow construction paper corncobs. There are many things I would rather do after staggering in the front door after a long week of learning, but ... Read more »
Um, about that 3 pets thing…
My husband asked me the other day if the kids knew Callie was gone. To be honest, I haven't brought it up. If this had been our first lost pet this year things might have been different, but after three confirmed deaths in a 7 month period, I think they need a bit of a break. Yesterday, someone asked my daughter how many pets we had. "Two cats, and one dog," she said. My husband and I looked at each other. "The black cat is Apollo, and the gray one with black stripes is Callie, and our dog is ... Read more »
Dog Beach Redux
September 13th marks the third annual National Pet Memorial Day. I didn't even know there was a National Pet Memorial Day, and it took a bit of digging to determine how this day came about (it appears to have been designated by the International Association of Pet Cemeteries), but just so you know, it's the second Sunday of September. I wrote a post about Emmett's last trip to Dog Beach before I knew it was his last trip to Dog Beach, and I never did post it. It seems like as good an excuse ... Read more »
September 11, 2009
It's a little surreal to think that it has already been eight years since the events of September 11th. The coverage over the past couple of years has been quieter and quieter, as those sharp visceral memories have faded into sad remembrances of a horrible time in our history. I was far from New York at the time, in my last year of vet school in California. My mother woke me up with a phone call, telling me to turn on the TV. We silently sat and watched the towers fall; both of us alone, ... Read more »
Family ties
Brody is not Emmett, nor should he be. There is a lot I have yet to learn about Brody: his personality, his likes and dislikes and quirks. I am excited for that period of discovery. I have been blessed with such vivacious pets in my life, from crotchety Taffy to daft Nuke, mild Mu and the inimitable Emmett. I can't wait to find out who Brody will be. I've already found that he, unlike my other dogs to date, has begun bonding immediately with people other than myself in the family. That is great. ... Read more »
When the river meets the sea
Emmett's ashes came back today. I was doing well this week, but this kind of brought me back to all the sadness and feelings of loss I haven't finished working my way through yet. Did you know I almost didn't adopt Emmett? That would have been the worst mistake I never knew I made. In 2002, I had just lost my dog Nuke, the sweet and slightly touched redbone coonhound who had spent his life at the vet hospital getting x-rayed by vet students. My home was his retirement, where he spent 3 ... Read more »
Oh, Emmett.
When my husband and I took Emmett to Dog Beach a couple of weeks ago, my husband commented how the place was like 'heaven for dogs'. I was thinking the same thing, though he probably wasn't thinking about it in as literal a context as I was. This weekend, I went again, without my husband and kids. Just me and Emmett. He had a fantastic time, wading through the surf, visiting other dogs, getting lots of pets. It was a perfect day. That night, things started to go downhill. Fast. I threw every ... Read more »
All Dogs Go To Kevin
The vinblastine (which we had tried last week when the other chemotherapy regimen failed) was kind of a bust. It was expected, but I'll keep trying as long as Emmett feels well. Hope springs eternal. Hope also springs eternal that a 3 year old might drop some Cheerios. We're feeling good enough to beg (CHECK OUT those big sad eyes! What a ham!) so that is a good thing. Man, I love that little guy. Last week, a person who had just lost his dog in a terrible way asked me through his ... Read more »
A day at the beach
I still have a hard time dealing with the fact that I am going through this yet again, so soon after losing Mulan. I wasn't ready yet (though are we ever, really?) The pain and sadness are exactly the same, as is the sorrowful anticipation. But some things are different. I made good on a promise I couldn't do for Mulan. There couldn't be a more perfect day to take a dog to Dog Beach than there was today. The sky was crystal clear, the waves mild, the pug meetup amusingly snorty. Parking was ... Read more »
One word is all you need
My boss is a very talented clinician. He has expertise in both internal medicine and in surgery, which makes him a great wealth of knowledge on just about anything. Except rats or hamsters, so I have some value to my place of employment. I went into work today, on my day off, to watch him do a forelimb amputation. It went swimmingly, by the way. While the tech was with the dog in recovery, I was hanging out in the back and chatting while my boss looked at some of the drop offs. Among them was ... Read more »
For K
(K, I hope you don't mind me talking about you here- if so please let me know and I will remove this right away.) My heart is breaking for my friend today. She has a wonderful cat Bailey, whom she adores and spoils and overall just loves to pieces. Bailey has been having a rough go of it lately- what started as an upper respiratory infection turned into a frightening series of seizures. After a myriad of vet visits, referrals, clueless receptionists and a neurologist visit, K and her husband ... Read more »
When I die…
Please let me come back as a dog that lives in Carmel. I just got back from a most wonderful mini-trip to see a friend (if you read this blog from day one you would remember my mention of Candie from vet school) who is now an emergency vet up in Northern California. She mentioned that she has been to Carmel a few times and suggested we go grab dinner there one night and try to spot Clint Eastwood. While I didn't see Dirty Harry, I spotted a good 50 dogs in a one block radius- in and out of ... Read more »
That sound you hear is my heart breaking
I was a very sensitive kid. So much, in fact, that my mother only got through "Rock a Bye Baby" one time because I cried so hard at the idea of "down will come baby cradle and all." What a mean lullaby. I couldn't watch Road Runner cartoons because I was so sympathetic to the coyote- he wasn't evil, he was just a carnivore. He just wanted to eat. And Tom and Jerry? Awful. Poor Tom. I'd cry every time I had to watch him get disemboweled, electrocuted, or decapitated. Man, that was a sadistic ... Read more »
An unplanned entry
When Mulan was sick last year, the simple act of petting her was a stressful event. There was always a new lump, some sore spot, something to make me nervous and want to do tests and see what was going on. It was always such a relief to pet Emmett, so sturdy and unproblematic, to scratch him under the chin and not feel enlarged nodes, to thump him the way you thump big dogs in greeting and not worry about hurting him. And after Mulan died, under the grief and sorrow there was also a weight ... Read more »
True confession
I have a confession to make, and this one is hard. Skippy is no longer with me. This is painful. I feel like a failure, especially since I spend so much time talking about responsibility and how a pet is a lifetime commitment. I still believe that, which is why I also think you should be really careful about the hows and whens of bringing a new pet into the home, and that is where I really screwed up. I knew after Mulan died that I would eventually want another dog, and I had a specific kind ... Read more »
Working on the hyperlichenification process
I.e. trying to get a thicker skin. Today I went into a room to give a little dachshund puppy his vaccine boosters. This was a cute dog. Seriously cute. I had seen him once before, 3 weeks prior, for his first vaccination and he was healthy and adorable then, as he was today. I went in and gushed, trying to ignore the fact of the very stone faced owner glaring at me. Everyone has bad days and bad moods, right? She asked me a couple of questions that I started to answer, and she cut me off each ... Read more »
Shades of silver
I haven't euthanized a pet in a couple of weeks. That is one of the things I like about day practice, as opposed to emergency, less of that sad stuff. But for whatever reason, this sort of thing comes in waves, and the tide came rolling in today. First was a young cat who was horrifically sick. He was so jaundiced that you could see the yellow tinge from across the room. The owner had him euthanized. I never did find out what the cause was. Next was an older cat, who was also horrifically ... Read more »
