This call takes place about 5 minutes after I leave:
Staff: Hello, how may I help you?
Client: I need to talk to the doctor right now.
Staff: She’s left for the day, how can I help you?
Client: Can I have her cell phone number?
Staff: I’m afraid not, is there something I can help you with?
Client: She gave my dog some medicine two weeks ago and it’s not working. The dog is still itchy.
(Staff looks up the client: This person had come in one month ago, using a “free wellness exam” certificate in order to get her puppy with hardly any hair left evaluated. The dog looked suspiciously like it had a Demodex infection- a mite common to puppies. The owner declined a skin scrape to diagnose the mites, injections to help with the itching, and mite medicine, taking only a week’s worth of antibiotics. Staff reads notes to client, including “strongly advise skin scrape for mites”.)
Staff: We can get you in first thing tomorrow, will that work?
Client: NO! She needs to call something in RIGHT NOW!
Staff: I’m afraid I can’t reach her right now. Would you like the number for the emergency clinic?
Client: Can they call something in for me?
Staff: Without you going in?
Staff: I highly doubt it.
*dial tone as client hangs up*