I admit it, I’m a reality TV addict. While other, more serious and conscientious veterinarians are catching up on their journal reading or maybe doing some online continuing education, I’m rewinding the Tivo so I can force my husband to watch Alex Wong’s routine on So You Think You Can Dance.
“I love dance,” I sighed as I reclined on the couch with my Nilla wafers. “These guys look like they’re dancing on air.”
“So what did you do today?” asked my already-bored husband.
“Um, I gave a constipated cat an enema,” I offered. “His poop still feels like rocks in his colon so if these stool softeners don’t work we have to anesthetize him to manually pull the poop out.”
My husband stared at me a moment, then decided to watch the show after all.
I’m sure dancers would tell you all sorts of unglamorous behind-the-scenes stuff too if you asked them, about torn ligaments and rotting toenails and partner BO. They don’t show that on the show, do they? Sometimes it’s better not to know. We just want to see the show!
For those looking for the high production value version of this job, I recommend James Herriot books and Marty Becker’s blog (I really do! They’re great!) But for those who like to turn rocks over with their toes and look for bugs, who want to know what happens after we leave the exam room covered in puppy kisses, well, here it is in all its depraved glory. Sticking my finger up a disgruntled cat’s rear end assessing just how hard his stools are.
Meanwhile, across the room, a dog with kennel cough sneezed a green glob of mucous into my tech’s mouth. Accounting doesn’t look so bad after all, does it?
Lisa says
Ha, ha, those rank up there with the semen gone wild that ends up in the vet tech’s hair as she’s holding the large dog for the vet to do AI on it!
Pikachu says
OOOps Hair gel .
Lisa W says
I did indeed LOL!
caren gittleman says
loved today’s posting! Have a great weekend!
Jamie says
Wow! LOL!
Though I do have to say, I watched Alex’s dance a few times over myself! LOVED IT!
Leigh says
LOL!!!! I usually can’t tell my friends or family members what I do at work, because they all get thoroughly disgusted.
The worst thing that’s happened to me is having chunks of blood from a lacerated ear flap fly into my eye (actually on the eyeball). I had to use the emergency eyewash station to get it all out!
Ashley says
Alex’s routine was so gorgeous it made me tear up a little. I love that show!
Natasha says
Haha! I’m so lucky to have an EMT as a husband – we can swap gross “day at work” stories! The other day, someone was describing an emotional process to me, “All of the nasty stuff finally rises to the surfaces, and you just have to skim it off the top.” My unappreciated reply? “Kind of like a fecal float!” Hmph. Well I thought it was a good metaphor.
I absolutely love SYTYCD!!
Reese says
Excellent story, Dr. V. I lol-ed.
Peggy Frezon says
Sometimes when reality is too boring/frantic/exhausting/icky we all need a dose of reality TV to escape. My personal favs are Survivor and Amazing Race. (There! I admitted it!)
Liz says
ugh, Squeaky had to have an enema last year (he would be very embarrassed if he thought i was putting this on the internet), it was waaaaaay gross. solved his problem though, so as cat-parents we are very grateful Dr V!
Pikachu says
Dr V , you always tell the gross tales but somehow make them seem not so gross. I love it 🙂
Shauna (Fido & Wino) says
That made me laugh 🙂
I used to be a dancer- all kinds of un-glam… But I don’t want to wreck the “So You Think” fun 🙂 The lights & the stage *were* pretty awesome though 🙂