It is one of the sad ironies of being a veterinarian in clinical practice that most of your clients are majorly unhappy to see you. (Retrievers don't count, they're always happy to see you.) The reasons are obvious: vet clinics mean temperature taking, and shots, and cold tables. Trust me, I don't much enjoy heading off to my doctor's office either, nice as the staff is. Those awful half length hospital gowns they give you (ladies, you know the ones I'm referring to)- cold and humiliating. ... Read more »
Musings
One Twenty Over Eighty
A few years ago I ran away from my job. At least, that's what I called it at the time, that is how I framed it in my head. I couldn't hack it, I was a failure as a vet. My mind was wrecked, my physical health was wrecked, and my stomach curled up into knots every time I pulled into the parking lot. It wasn't only me who suffered; I knew my heart was not where it needed to be for my patients. They deserved for me to want to be there. It was a bad place to be in. With the gift of ... Read more »
A grateful heart spreads like….well, wildfire
There are many things I could be upset about today. The fact that authorities suspect arson in the vast majority of wildfires that devastated San Diego this week, for example. That's a good place to start. Or the trolls whose only response to the news was, "That's what you get for living in a dry place, morons, burn" as though there were a place on Earth immune to Mother Nature in some form or another. But I'm too grateful to worry myself with fools and psychotics at the moment. There is ... Read more »
Class of 2014: 5 steps to loving your first job
We're about one month away from colleges and universities turning new grads loose on the world, a day of joy and, if I recall correctly, complete, abject fear. 2014 is a rough year to graduate vet school. In my day (cue Dana Carvey Grumpy old man voice), back in the middle of the dotcom boom and a perceived 'veterinary shortage', the world was at our fingertips, a lush green forest ripe for the plucking. Now new grads are being forced upon a Dune-like landscape filled with such ominous ... Read more »
Lean On, Over, and Around
March is Women's History Month, if you didn't know. I work in a strange profession, one that has changed quite solidly in demographics from its original incarnation to its current status, graduating classes of row after row of- well, men, mostly- now replaced, to an 80% extent, by women. I spend a lot of time talking about veterinary medicine, and I would say about 80% of the time I am talking about it with women (who'd have guessed?) Does the changing demographic matter? Yes and no. I may be ... Read more »
Stupid people tricks
There's nothing worse than sticking your foot in your mouth. I hate that feeling when the words escape your mouth and hang there, floating in the air, as it slowly dawns on you what horrible thing you've just said. I try to be cognizant of these things in my work as a vet. I'm pretty sure I've said some awful things unintentionally, and the most I can do is hope the person didn't actually really register it. Like when I'm coughing in the middle of a euthanasia, and I apologize by saying, "My ... Read more »
A place of passing
"I'm never going back," I have heard more than one pet owner say. They are talking about the office of their veterinarian, a person with whom they have built a relationship for years, someone they like and trust. But their pet died there, and the painful memories are too strong. So strong for some people that they go and find a new vet, even if they liked their old one just fine. It's one of the reasons I like having the option that I offer, of performing in-home euthanasia and pet hospice ... Read more »
Grumpy Vet is not amused
I was debating going to SXSW this week, but as it didn't come to fruition I needed to rely on my husband's reporting back to let me know all the stuff going on and if it was really worth the four figure ticket price. "They have animal stuff here," he said. "You can get your picture taken with Grumpy Cat." Really? I asked him. "Yes," he said. "There were lines out the door last year. She's here again." "The cat is at a tech conference?" I asked again, trying to get my brain around ... Read more »
It’s OK to laugh
On March first, I hit 'send' and the first draft of my manuscript went flying through the ether to New York to land in the capable hands of my editor. It was simultaneously exhilarating and terrifying. If any of you watched the Oscars and heard De Niro deliver this little nugget: The mind of a writer can be a truly terrifying thing. Isolated, neurotic, caffeine-addled, crippled by procrastination, consumed by feelings of panic, self-loathing, and soul-crushing inadequacy. And that’s on a good ... Read more »
We love you to death
Veterinary medicine, the happiest field on earth, land of puppy butts and kitty snuggles and Pet Doctor Barbies in hotpants, or so they told me when I was 10. Or perhaps it is the land of crushing student debt, clients frustrated that they are priced out of affordable care, and the unending mental strain of not being able to make every client happy and whole at the price they want you to provide it for. Maybe it's somewhere in between, but to be honest it seems to me like it's leaning a ... Read more »
A Lesson in Love and Heart
One year ago today, we said goodbye to Kekoa. After a month of bucket list indulgences going from kale to turkey and then, that day, chocolate chip bacon ice cream, I said I love you one last time. We pet owners talk a lot about heart dogs, that dog who just 'got' you, the dog who changed you and will never, ever be replaced (you can substitute dog for any pet, of course.) And once you have a heart dog, once you lose a heart dog, you may wonder if you will ever have another one again. I'm ... Read more »
We Will Remember You- Tonight and Always
Yesterday, I was working on a homework assignment for a course I am taking on pet loss and bereavement. I was reading about the guilt so much of us feel after losing a pet, and one of the exercises they recommend we do is imagine a conversation with our pet. I decided I would try this with Kekoa, as I struggled- like so many people do- with knowing if it was the right time to say goodbye to her last year as she dealt with bone cancer. Me: Kekoa, I'm sorry. Kekoa: I love you. Me: I feel ... Read more »
We Will Remember You: A Pet Loss Memorial Candle Ceremony
There is something vastly powerful about going through grief with friends. It validates, it resonates, it comforts. When it comes to losing a pet, too many of us are forced to endure the pain without that camaraderie of a circle of friends. To that end, and because I know so many people continue to hurt and feel alone in their grief over the loss of a beloved pet, The Tiniest Tiger and I are hosting a Pet Loss Candle Ceremony next Wednesday, February 5th, at 6 pm PST. What Will ... Read more »
What to Say to Someone in Mourning
This morning, I had the pleasure of sitting down with Joanne McGonagle over at The Tiniest Tiger for a Google Hangout on the topic of pet loss. I had this whole long post about how easy it is to get wrong and how hard it is to get right, but rather than go through the long sordid tales of all the times I've said the exact wrong thing I thought I would instead sum up what we, along with all the wonderful participants, concluded during the course of the talk. Some of the statements are specific ... Read more »
My husband and Her: A neato love story
I have no one to blame but myself, of course, for the events that have transpired since Christmas. I was the one who brought her in, invited her to come into our home and get to know the place. My husband said it was the only thing he wanted this year, so I went with it, albeit with some trepidation. You should have seen his face when he realized what I had done. "Wow!" he said. "Finally!" The children looked on in confusion. Brody ran away. Only Penelope, the newest addition to the fold, ... Read more »
She might have a Caesar
One part of being a medical professional that no one really prepares you for is how to deliver bad news. If you watch those who have done it long enough (read: emergency doc) you'll see the professional approach: sterile, blunt, quick. You have to do it that way, because you have a bunch of patients still alive to attend to. OK, not this blunt: But that's a learned skill. Those who haven't done it as frequently have obvious tells: the grimace when your hopeful face meets their eyes, the ... Read more »
The Secrets to Saving Money at the Vet
Hoo boy, that 20/20 piece sure stirred up some emotions, didn't it? And it's Thanksgiving, a week of gratitude, so I'm going to take a step back and say thank you to all the wonderful readers and colleagues who make writing this worthwhile. In honor of that, I'm going to take a moment and also share with you some of my own veterinary secrets. For the low low price of nothing, I want to explain to you what I believe, based on over a decade now in the field, is the best way to save money at the ... Read more »
Some Veterinarians Sell Unnecessary Online Memberships By Throwing Colleagues Under the Bus
Some Veterinarians Sell Unnecessary Shots, Tests to Make Extra Money, Says Former Vet Did you see this bit on 20/20 this weekend? Ah, media. Titled "Veterinary Confessions," the piece follows a couple of dogs through a series of veterinary visits where different vets offer different services based on their clinical experience, interspersed with the contrite admonitions of a former veterinarian who says that he was, before he relinquished his license (more on that later), the medical ... Read more »
