Well, it’s been 5 months since the last time I tried to figure out what to do with my dog’s ashes, and I’m sorry to report I am no closer to a resolution than I was then. Mulan is still on top of the TV. Emmett is next to her. I’m not sure what to do.
Scattering at the house is out, until I’m sure we’re not moving in the next decade. Too much guilt.
Scattering in public is illegal; besides which, I’ve heard too many horror stories of lovely ceremonies at Sunset Cliffs ruined by an errant gust of wind dumping Uncle Ed back into the faces of the mourners instead of gently spreading him over the Pacific.
Life Gems and other forms of jewelry are out, at least for now.
What’s a girl to do? The cedar boxes in which they arrived are OK, but nothing special. Perhaps while I ponder what to do I should invest in a nicer urn.
How about one of these?
For a mere $2600, you too can take advantage of the latest facial reconstruction technology to create a classy, subtle homage to your dearly departed by placing their ashes into a replica of their decapitated lobotomized skull. All I can think of when I look at that guy with his bemused face as if even he can’t believe what is going on is Ray Liotta in Hannibal. Hey, those Life Gems aren’t looking so ridiculous anymore, are they?
I sent the company an e-mail asking them if they had any plans for similar urns for pets. Not that I want one, mind you, and much to my happiness they said not currently, but it might happen in the future if there is enough interest. Let’s hope not.
I have a great idea! Maybe I can get one made of MY head, and then I can put Mulan and Emmett into it, and have the bottom engraved with- are you ready- “You are always on my mind.”